Friday, June 30, 2006
Friday Bacon
Bacon Degree: I'm going to the races tomorrow (also a reminder that Spring Racing Carnival is coming...soon...ish)
I may have strayed a little from the motto of celebs around here at HLOD but I saw these images and couldn't resist. With the Spring Racing Carnival coming soon (and shouldn't that be a treat - fingers crossed Tiffani Wood comes down) these pics are a timely reminder about the often delicate balance of wearing a beautiful outfit and being completely plastered!
You've got to admire her flexibility really... but as countless mothers always said, a good lady shuts her lugs. A slapper lets her drunken boyfriend hoist her into the air then spreads it wide for what can only be considered a sordid X-rated Dancing with the Stars manoeuvre
It's always the way isn't it? You've had an awesome day, won a few dollar and was happy to see that no one was wearing your dress. Meanwhile, your friend and supposed ally has got absolutely plastered, ruined her outfit, spent all her money meaning she solely depends on you and your money for a lift home. Let this be a forewarning ladies. Lightweight friends are baggage!
Then there is this awful friend who let some big press photographer come up and snap happy at her clearly comatose friend. The entire crowd around her is having a good old chuckle, thinking 'Phew, glad that's not me!' Poor little lass, I feel sorry for her. I've been in that situation and even lying in a comatose state, feeling good awful, the tiny sober part of your brain is saying 'You should be so mortified' and this poor girl is clearly hearing that part of her brain.
PS Ironic that she's passed out directly in front of the bar too...not really ironic I suppose, more simple consquence.
Here is the worst friend of all...the absent friend. This girl is in all sorts of trouble. I think this is the day we've all though (without the ill fitting dress, I hope) where you will never, ever be drunker in your life. This is the bottom, the pit of ugliness - the day you talk about with awe and shock in years to come...the pain will ease and the memories will focus on the earlier highlights of the day. This lass' problem was the fact she was snapped in such a state. The memory won't fade on that one.
A Letter from her Royal Highness Queen Liz,
Dear Commoners,
It has come to my attention that whilst attending Ladies Day at Ascot this year, many did not in fact, participate as Ladies should.
Let my grandchildren Harry and William NOT be a lesson in social decorum for while drinking with friends and having glorious time, look like fun - it's not. A jolly good afternoon is a brisk walk with the corgies and killing something to which the dogs can later play with.
As you can see, my time at races was full of laughs and good times. One must remember to keep ones emotions in check, especially at public events. So until next year, when I see you all unfortunately, at Ascot, decorum, sensible shoes and fake smiles are the order of the day. Alcohol and men are not.
Small waves and looks of scorn,
Queen Liz
