Friday, July 21, 2006
Friday Bacon
On the Menu: Miss Universe Competition, LA
Bacon Degree: Because only three years ago no one cared about this pageant in Australia and then came a lovely little lady named Jennifer.
Miss Bulgaria & Miss Latvia
You’d be forgiven for thinking these two ladies were heading to Miss Universe Adults Only. They look like Mariah Carey and Paris Hilton before a night on the town and that’s not a fantastic celebrity duo to emulate. My favourite from the two of them is the most revolting pair of red satin shoes EVER worn by Miss Latvia. European fashion rears its ugly head.
Miss El Salvador
You just know that all the other contestants hate Miss El Sal. She just screams ‘I’m the Most Popular Girl in School and I Make Nasty Jokes About You Behind Your Back While Pretending to be Your Friend.’ I do like her cute little outfit and she’s got the teapot pose down pat but there’s just that X-factor and not in a good way, more a Daniel McPherson horrible television way.
Miss Estonia
I’m think she may be a top ten contender. Fresh faced, virginal in white and not rakishly thin, Miss E is hitting all the right notes here. Her demure pony tail, her sweet gold hoop earrings – it’s the perfect statement to make to the judges ‘I will not be caught in a sex scandal’.
Miss Egypt
Wowee is this a special number. More normally seen at Boutique nightclub than in a beauty pageant, I get the feeling that Miss Egypt may be sorely regretting her choice. Looking at the other, more clothed contestants, she’s probably thinking to herself ‘DAMN IT – that’s the last time I listen to my brother’s advice on what he thinks is sexy.’
Miss Germany
The fantastic fashion from the European nations makes you wonder how Versace, Dolce & Gabbana and Yves Saint Laurent ever found their way through the muck. Nothing says grace, elegance and beauty that Miss Universe requires like a cleavage key hole with fake jewels that were most likely glue gunned on. Expect to see this outfit on next year's Eurovision host.
Miss Lebanon & Miss France
Do you think Miss Lebanon is the social pariah of the entire event? Everyone’s steering right well clear of her in case some journalists ask them what they actually think of the international crisis. However points to Miss France for not only sitting with her, but sitting near food! I do however have to remove all Miss France’s social points for wearing footless stockings, sunglasses at night and satin with denim. International diplomacy can’t protect you from bad fashion.
Miss Norway & Miss Mauritious(sic)
The Prom Queen and her MILF mother? Apparently not but you’d want to check and be sure. Miss Norway has ruined a perfectly tasteful outfit with a black head band and matching purse? I’m all okay with accessories matching, in fact it helps if they do but not when they completely screw up the other colour. Still my favourite contestant is Miss Maurit. I don’t want to be rude (sure!) but someone needs to ID check her? Also that denim skirt was in the bargain bin at Target last week and even then people were steering clear.
Miss USA
There’s a reason pageant history runs deep in the States – it’s cause they’re good at it. And here is another stellar entry. A sweet, gorgeous not trumped up like a turkey girl in a wholesome yet sexy outfit. I love her top and her bangles and while they don’t necessarily matching together – it’s not a huge drama. Of course she will go far (as if they'd boot the host nation out in the first rounds!) but good luck to her I say.
Miss Australia
Hello? Erin where are you? In her first faulty performance - a 151 press event photos taken there was no Miss Australia to be found! Probably stuck with Jennifer, who was reliving her glory days, starting every sentence ‘When I was Miss Universe’. Erin get yourself primped, preened and in front of a camera – we know you like them, the boys at Zoo Weekly told us so.
Bacon Degree: Because only three years ago no one cared about this pageant in Australia and then came a lovely little lady named Jennifer.
Miss Bulgaria & Miss Latvia
You’d be forgiven for thinking these two ladies were heading to Miss Universe Adults Only. They look like Mariah Carey and Paris Hilton before a night on the town and that’s not a fantastic celebrity duo to emulate. My favourite from the two of them is the most revolting pair of red satin shoes EVER worn by Miss Latvia. European fashion rears its ugly head.
Miss El Salvador
You just know that all the other contestants hate Miss El Sal. She just screams ‘I’m the Most Popular Girl in School and I Make Nasty Jokes About You Behind Your Back While Pretending to be Your Friend.’ I do like her cute little outfit and she’s got the teapot pose down pat but there’s just that X-factor and not in a good way, more a Daniel McPherson horrible television way.
Miss Estonia
I’m think she may be a top ten contender. Fresh faced, virginal in white and not rakishly thin, Miss E is hitting all the right notes here. Her demure pony tail, her sweet gold hoop earrings – it’s the perfect statement to make to the judges ‘I will not be caught in a sex scandal’.
Miss Egypt
Wowee is this a special number. More normally seen at Boutique nightclub than in a beauty pageant, I get the feeling that Miss Egypt may be sorely regretting her choice. Looking at the other, more clothed contestants, she’s probably thinking to herself ‘DAMN IT – that’s the last time I listen to my brother’s advice on what he thinks is sexy.’
Miss Germany
The fantastic fashion from the European nations makes you wonder how Versace, Dolce & Gabbana and Yves Saint Laurent ever found their way through the muck. Nothing says grace, elegance and beauty that Miss Universe requires like a cleavage key hole with fake jewels that were most likely glue gunned on. Expect to see this outfit on next year's Eurovision host.
Miss Lebanon & Miss France
Do you think Miss Lebanon is the social pariah of the entire event? Everyone’s steering right well clear of her in case some journalists ask them what they actually think of the international crisis. However points to Miss France for not only sitting with her, but sitting near food! I do however have to remove all Miss France’s social points for wearing footless stockings, sunglasses at night and satin with denim. International diplomacy can’t protect you from bad fashion.
Miss Norway & Miss Mauritious(sic)
The Prom Queen and her MILF mother? Apparently not but you’d want to check and be sure. Miss Norway has ruined a perfectly tasteful outfit with a black head band and matching purse? I’m all okay with accessories matching, in fact it helps if they do but not when they completely screw up the other colour. Still my favourite contestant is Miss Maurit. I don’t want to be rude (sure!) but someone needs to ID check her? Also that denim skirt was in the bargain bin at Target last week and even then people were steering clear.
Miss USA
There’s a reason pageant history runs deep in the States – it’s cause they’re good at it. And here is another stellar entry. A sweet, gorgeous not trumped up like a turkey girl in a wholesome yet sexy outfit. I love her top and her bangles and while they don’t necessarily matching together – it’s not a huge drama. Of course she will go far (as if they'd boot the host nation out in the first rounds!) but good luck to her I say.
Miss Australia
Hello? Erin where are you? In her first faulty performance - a 151 press event photos taken there was no Miss Australia to be found! Probably stuck with Jennifer, who was reliving her glory days, starting every sentence ‘When I was Miss Universe’. Erin get yourself primped, preened and in front of a camera – we know you like them, the boys at Zoo Weekly told us so.
# posted by HLOD : 1:26 PM
