The Harsh Light of Day

Antonia Kidman

I share a house with my sister and I’ll be the first to admit. She’s far more glamorous and fashion orientated than I am, but I use this to my advantage. I take hints from her efforts and realise my limitations so I don’t mimic her. If there is a particularly nice piece I might borrow it on occasion (of course asking first lest WWIII be unleashed). Which brings to me ask why Antonia Kidman continues to shop at Target Lovely Ladies Section? You know, I’m sure if you ask nicely Tones, Nic wouldn’t mind if you borrowed something once or twice. Please get onto that immediately.


Carla McGuire

Thank GOD. After a disastrous Logies appearance by Carla, she disappeared – I know I was harsh but it was with good intent. And it seems to have worked. Here is the demure and elegant fashion plate we love. A simple black dress with beading neckline and exposed (but not over exposed) cleavage. If only Eddie could turn around Nine, like Carla turned around her fashion fatality.


Chris Hemsworth

Yes, I may have a slight leaning towards Chris and I’ll state that upfront. I may find him delicious and horribly cast in Home & Away as boy one minute and a man the next. However my love does not blind me from things, I can see past six pack toned chest …sorry where was I? Okay, the outfit is fine – very cool laidback guy. It’s the scruff and hair. Designer stubble is fine – hello Matthew Fox. However scraggly I haven’t washed my hair and forgot to shave for this event is NOT okay. Bad Chris.


Emily Barclay

It’s weird crossing of themes here from Emily. I think she was Candy Striping at the local hospital and then realised in a mad dash she had a function on. Rumaging through her bag all she found was the cardie – quick, pop that on and Mr Taxi Driver, stop here at the 7-11 I just need to grab some stockings. So while I applaud her generous giving of time, maybe a little diary organiser should be on the shopping list.


Gian Rooney

If your friend, who you’ve known and loved for years and who you’ve supported through thick and thin called you up one night, just to see how you were doing, and your great, life is normal, but she’s heading off to a big red carpet do tonight, and then you ask what is she wearing and she say’s to you, ‘Oh this completely funky metallic silver shorts with a matching top and then cause of that stupid ice show, I’m still on the crutches so I’m going to cover my plaster cast with a black fishnet sock thing?’ – would you say something? Would you offer a cautionary note even though it may end badly? Ask yourself that today – it’s a tough question of friendship.




















Kate Fischer & Michelle Walsh

Will this damn kaftan thing never die!!! It’s awful, it’s in no way flattering on anyone that I’ve seen and it requires tricky nude lingerie. Yet somehow everyone and their dog is deciding this is the hottess thing to be in right now. While Michelle clearly trounces Kate in who looks better in the flimsy sheet – it’s not something to celebrate Michelle, it’s really not.

This kaftan of horror is not hot, it’s not flattering, it is what Noelene Brown wears around the pool while knocking down a few G&T’s in a can. So if you spot this on the racks – RUN, don’t walk, RUN in the other direction!


Lee Furlong

Lee seems to have confused the fashion show with a Year 11 formal. Right down to the tacky bag and Speeds sparkly shoes its blah. It’s a boring black dress with shock a cleavage. Really Lee, everyone woman these days is showing the coconuts on the red carpet – that’s not going to get attention any more. Time to step it up a notch.


Natalie Bassing…(sorry still can’t do it)

Holy Moly! There are some very good things here and some very bad things here. The dress is incredibly sexy – very va va va voom. You can see why Dr Karl left Susan stranded time and time again. I would also imagine it would require incredible posture as one errant slouch and everyone checks out Nat’s Rogue Traders. The red hot blooded woman lipstick and nails are great too, completes the ensemble. Sadly the bad things stick out too much to be ignored. Firstly - either it’s a wig and a bad wig or someone has screwed up Natalie’s hair so much it looks like a wig – the fact that I’m confused means it’s not a good hairstyle. Those horrendous boots – in another outfit they may work well but here – it’s terrible…oh the horror of it all!


Signourney G

I really like this dress – for starters because it’s not a kaftan and secondly, she hasn’t felt the urge to stick a belt around it. Bravo. But it’s classy and stylish and the shoes are cute and match the dress perfectly. The only thing is the massive chunky black bag. I know it’s cool and very in but seriously, it’s overwhelming the poor little dress, and what’s in the bag that couldn’t have been left on the bench at home.


Stephanie McIntosh

For all that is good and holy, for every ray of sunshine in the world, why, oh why Stephanie would you not wear a bra!! I can see the good intentions in this dress – the empire waist to draw attention away from her middle which inexplicably photographs badly. The black which is always slimming and lovely softly styled hair. It’s all the here, the tools for a good performance but then you let the coconuts split apart so far that Nick’s coveted Premiere Ship cup could rest in there. Instead of a nicely shaped silhouette – she is now in a cleavage baring black sack.