Monday, June 11, 2007
The Glory and Gory-ness, Or Class and Ass
April Rose
It’s like looking in a mirror…if I was Twiggy and it was some forty odd years ago but you get my drift. Very glam and very dignified and totally appropriate for Bvlgari store opening. It’s very fresh and youthful and I have no idea who or what April Rose is or does but so far, she’s doing well by me.
Brooke Sheehan
From classy Bvlgari to assy breasts. In what is an early contender for ideal dress for Brownlow 07, Brooke attempts to play off her best assets but merely reminds us why red string isn’t just a Kaballah bracelet. With fantastically awful peacock ruffle as a train, and barely restrained squashed breasts seeking refuge on any escape they possible can. Trash-tastic!
Cate Blanchett
A lot of fashion and the choices made are highly dependent on moxie and how much the wearer has. How much self belief in their choice do they have? Do they belief that the interesting clasped and Dynasty-esque shoulder padded dress is beautiful creation and fashion forward or do they believe it’s an early statement on their Indiana Jones villainess character? I think with Cate she believes the first, I myself tend to believe the latter.
Camilla Frank
Camilla continues to push the tie-dye floating dress fashion up hill. It seems that she is, thankfully, alone in her efforts and here she demonstrates why. A shapeless, unflattering cut with colours that drag her down, I feel this outfit could be equally at home a Brazilian drug lord’s wife.
Damien Bodie
Elvis asked that everyone stay clear of his blue suede shoes but Damien seems to invite, hell, welcome everyone to step on his. And god don’t we want to; what should only appear on Melbourne Uni Creative Arts students from the early 90’s some how made it’s way onto the red carpet, and adding further insult to injury, it’s the Ocean 13 premiere. A film that in many parts in dedicated to dressing men well. Damien don’t tarnish them with your blue Doc Martin brush.
Ella Hooper
Well look at Ella Hooper, all grown and still not quite sure how to dress herself. Firstly, I’ve also liked little Ella, she of the barnstorming voice and rocking dreadlocks. I remember living the Killing Heidi CD for the six months on its release. I have, however felt, that Ella struggles with fashion, she struggles with how to apply it to herself. Here she totally ruins a lovely top half, with a terrible bottom half. Leggings that hit her right on the ankles, and then ugly red chunky shoes and it makes her look…heavy!
Giaan Rooney
Oh dear Giaan! You’ve been performing so well lately, and then you do this! You combine two completely unrelated items and hope they get along. And like Paris and jail, it’s just a mixture for trouble. This outfit had the potential to be good, I’m sure the dress is lovely, and I’m sure the jacket is cool but together, oh no, no, no, no, no.
Hayley Zalewski
And here they come, this season’s Big Brother-ites ready to attend envelope openings, furniture store closings and local sausage sizzles. Hayley clearly isn’t mooning over the boyfriend still in the house and has time to pop to the movies, but considering what she’s wearing maybe more mooning is due. The awful hem lined skirt which a few people are exhibiting only makes me think she’s dropped loose change down her dress, and with the fishnets and cut off boots it reeks of ‘hottest of hot latest so cool sure to be seen’ fashion.
Jodi Gordon
Okay, I’m going to say it – I want to be Jodi Gordon. I want her access to fashion wardrobes, I want her silky brown hair, I want her glowing complexion, I want her amazing accessories. And rest assured people, in the near future, I will be attempting this lovely soft hair do. I will attempt to find a dress that lovely. I will but attempt!
Kerri-Anne Kennerly
We know Kezza loves a shiny fabric, it’s something she is drawn to like Neighbours starlets to bad fashion. and of course, it doesn’t look fantastic on her, it doesn’t flatter her and it could be so much nicer. That’s expected though and it doesn’t shock me at all, however the shoes, oh the shoes! What a mixed up crazy peep tie confection are they?
Kelly Smythe
I’ve been pretty harsh on Kelly, and yes even though the site is so named, Kelly has been on the end of my particular brand of harsh-ness for many occasions. Well Kelly, take a bow, you’ve fought back the best way possible and look smashing. The white pants/black top combo is super and the high waisted look gives her length without adding weight and while the cuff is quite long, I don’t want to focus of the negative. Not when Kelly has seen the non cleavage exposing light.
Kit Willow & Pip Edwards
You know, there’s supporting the green world we all want to love and then there’s wearing garbage bags to a red carpet event. Sure, try and accessorize your way out of it but it’s not fooling anyone. I’m sure GladBags are thrilled and the possible new business income but I’m not!
Natasha Belling
It’s very glamour, high end Oscar red carpet appearance dress for Tarsh. I’m loathe to say it’s a tad too much but it kinda is. It leaves me wondering was this originally Tarsh’s Logies dress and it ran late from the seamstress? Did she lose it in a cab like Sharni Vision did and then find it again and think, damn it, I will get a wear out of this.
Sara Groen
Sara to me is like a second rate (and not in a nasty way) Jodi Gordon. She wears lovely outfits, she always tends to look good but unlike Ms Gordon, there’s just something missing. This dress is a prime example. It’s a beautiful dress and the colour jumps but the fit seems slightly off and cut just a bit wrong. It’s all in degrees and for Sara, it’s a degrees away from being perfect.
Suzie Wilks
The dress itself and in and of itself is fine. I severely, severely question; question under intense scrutiny the choice of the tights. Fishnets? Really fishnets? Come on Suzie, I’m sorry but you and I both know, that you and fishnets never ever should be together. PS Your hairdresser deserves special credit, because his wrist must kill straightening and teasing all that hair.
Tara Moss
Oh Tara, stop it, please, please, please stop it. Stop dressing so damn well, stop looking sophisticated, bring back the mistress of pain, bring back the over usage of leather. Bring back the implied whip, we all knew you had. With Tiffani Wood being a mother and dressing appropriately, the mantle of favourite inappropriate dresser is wide open and you were in contention.
