The Harsh Light of Day

Okay, I’ve been terribly lazy and there was no update last week. And yes, there has been plenty of things to Harsh about, so really there’s no excuse but sometimes people, mamma has to live. Or in my case, do my laundry and get ready for my real job. Yep, I have one. I would say I promise that we are back on track here at Sunday but I won’t cause forks in the road and all that jazz. I am mildly confident (Marcia Hines is there room on your fence to sit) that I should be back on track.

Billy & Aleisha

Secretly, just between you and me, and a few other people. I’m secretly kind of pleased and very much surprised to see these two still together. Unlike previous BB relationships these two have been quietly restrained and private, which is frankly AMAZING! While the Blue Steel gaze that Billy’s attempting here is failing dismally and I’m not too sure about Aleisha’s Bee Movie dress, my more romantic side is going to let it pass – because who doesn’t secretly support a little reality TV romance – and don’t lie.

Bree & Brodie

These two on the other side of the coin, annoy the CRAP out of me. Firstly, I have no explanation for Bree’s dress sense and secondly her continual employment at Ten. And Brodie ... some people on reality TV can be annoyed about being portrayed as an idiot. I firmly believe you are a full time idiot. The glasses, mullet and self satisfied cheesy cat grin don’t sway me differently.

Camilla Frank

Dear Diary,
Tonight I went to a launch for a new hotel, something about pioneering and getting back to nature. The invitation mentioned something about meeting the natives, so I dressed in this awesome bearskin pantsuit. I found it on sale at the Paddington Markets. The guy I bought it off said something about it being a great rug but what does he know about fashion – I’m the designer! So basically, I was totally themed up and everyone else just came looking normal and lame. Losers,
Growling, Cami!

Chloe Lattanzi

Um...interesting, it’s well...there’s...well...okay, here’s goes...yeah...um...hmmm...I got nothing, there are simply no words.

Damien Leith

How do you stand in front of a mirror on the way out the door and as heterosexual male who is appealing to the nanna & mum market, see sparkly black tuxedo jacket, tight man t-shirt with no collar, a weird piece of rope masquerading as a tie, off colour denim and formal polished shoes and think I look matching and good and will make people remember my Idol time fondly? Do you dim the lights for that?

Danielle Foote

How is Danielle still on the celebrity guest list? Sure, it’s not the AFI’s but still, I’m surprised to see her dragging out the fifteen minutes so long. Especially in the orphan Annie sack dress she is wearing. Yes, she’s matching and her accessories and shoes are good but the dress itself ...it would make an excellent first day period, lay on the balcony dress. Not a red carpet dress.

Monique Coleman & Lucas Gabreel

Who? I hear many, many, many, many people say. They were in a little telemovie recently, didn’t get much attention, I don’t think you would have heard of it. A little something called ‘High School Musical 2.’ Firstly, I will right now say, I am a fan, I know the words, I may have learnt some of dances from the first one and yes, I know this is incredibly sad. However, I am pleased as punch to see Monique looking so good. Usually she’s standing next to the two skinny girls and she chooses to wear something truly horrible. Here she’s looking full figured and proud and sassy and Go Wildcats! (if you've seen it, you'll get it). Lucas is scaring me a little with his demonic Macauley Culkin’s younger brother thing but because he virtually saves the day in HSM2 (it’s okay, I know it’s that sad) I’ll forgive him the hair dye.

Natasha Pincus

A small time actor with indie cred, who dresses as if the world were one giant parent teacher interview. She is the new teacher, probably majored in art and teaches the kids all kinds of neat uses for pipe cleaners and sequins. She’s realised too late that all her wardrobe is tie dyed and hemp dresses and wouldn’t say respectable. So fashioning her pillow case, borrowing her dad’s pants from the 80’s and some of her brother’s school shoes, she thought she’d show those parents a thing or two.

Noni Hazelhurst

Noni has always been fond of a stripe. Whether it’s the couch or the curtains or her skirt, she’s not afraid to see the world as opportunity to audition for Charlie and Chocolate Factory 2: Revenge of the Oompa Loompa’s. With herself in the role as Head Mistress Oompa Loompa, I see box office gold.

Samantha Noble

It was all fine, all normal long hair and black party dress and what have you. And then the shoes that should be classed as weapons of mass destruction. Like a weird cross mutated version of tap shoes with heels and Sammy Davis Jnr rat pack dancing man shoes. If she’s planning a song and dance number for later, good effort in saving on carrying baggage but even then, I’m sure the dressing room would have held them for you.